Day 29 - I'm gonna do: this.

Day 29 - my goals for the next 30 days

I'm actually writing this one today- strange because I was once so proud to be writing more than a week ahead so I wouldn't have to worry about it.

But does that really count though?  Sure, I did the work- but isn't the goal to write every day to see how feelings have changed, major catastrophes that need to be addressed (like forgetting my phone today), or overall if my feelings on a subject had changed?

Anyway, things in life are changing drastically again.  I'm undecided if I think I'm falling back into depression or if I'm trying to regain a rhythm.

Overall, my summer goal is to regain myself- I need to be more self-reliant, more self disciplined, more self-motivated.  I've been letting life slip by.  I'm nearly 27 years old and I want to do sooooo much more with my life and I haven't.  There are children that have accomplished more and are more motivated to changing the world- and they are!  More than a quarter of my life is over- what do I have to show for it?  I have a degree and some certs, a broken marriage, and some pets.  Is that really all I have to show?

At the same time, I'm also (once again) alienating myself from people that really do want to hang with me.  I can't seem to find the balance.  Everybody works and I'm not working near as much as I did before- so where does all the time go?

I digress.

This is about my goals for the next month.  I decided to go low key for the most part- quoting from a notepad I purchased at Dave n Buster's - Hopes for the Week- high, medium, or low - Results of the week - high, medium, or low and quoting Linda's (coworker) answer- "if you set your hopes low then you won't be disappointed when your results are too".  I won't say that's motivating- but I want to start easy.

Today:
I'm pretty exhausted.  Today and tomorrow are extended hours as we wrap up registration.  I also enrolled in an online class that I need to get started on today.  I'm skipping FHE, I just don't think I have the energy and after not sleeping the past few days- I don't want to push it.  My poor house is still a mess (thank you evil puppies) and if I can maybe clean one room or something, I'll feel better.

This week:
I need to be more diligent in my running.  I skipped a few days last week because of the extended hours, but that is probably more reason to do it.  I have my 5k at the end of the week and I'm still running a 16 minute mile- I used to be at 10, sadness.  I'm glad it's also an obstacle course so I can be a little slow and just look awesome finishing with the beginners of the heat after (I'd be in front, right?) I also need to just CLEAN the house and do some grocery shopping.  Alice and I are having our 2 time rescheduled dinner Tuesday or Wednesday- I need to be more diligent in keeping up with people.

Next week:
It may be this week or next, but June 10- I switch to summer hours woohoo!!  I'll make it to institute ON TIME, FHE ON TIME (when I go), and have Friday OFF!!!  Every weekend's a 3 day weekend!  I'll also work a bit more (8-6 without lunch vs 8-5 with 1hr lunch).  Since I'll have more time, I also want to get more in shape- this is like a REQUIREMENT.  I'm hoping to buy a bike.  I have the plan to make muffins every working morning early and bike to random members' houses with them- especially my kids in Primary.  I need to engage them more.  I'm losing them and their families some (because they are ALL inactive) and I just feel that this would be a start.  Plus, I'll get to know some of them better and they'll quit asking me if I'm new.

The month:
Losing the 'fat roll' might be a bit lofty- but 5 pounds should be ok, or is that lofty too??  You're only supposed to lose 2 a week so that means I'd actually have to trying to lose a good amount of weight.  It took a few months to put on- might take a few years to lose.  I want to be recognizable at my high school reunion in 2015.  I also want to restart my goals if I happen to fall of the bandwagon (it's a given), and I hope to get a decent grade in my online class.  I don't do well with online classes, but if I can finally schedule and master these individual ones- I hope to maybe enroll in a Master's degree online program.